So there's this guy in my office I wanna bone..

Touch My Body by Mariah Carey YouTube Video

Couple: Jasper and Alice

Scenario: It’s Tuesday Night. The office is pretty empty. Alice has the IT guy Jasper cornered in the break room, again. Sure they’re violating about eight different bullet points in the employee handbook, but ever since Alice discovered this shy techno-geek was also very skillful with his tongue she just can’t seem to leave him alone. He doesn’t mind being used cause little does she know Jasper has all their little rendezvous on tape.

Recommendation: Proceed with caution when boning people you work with. I mean do it anyway, just proceed with caution.

Happy Sexin'!!!

Aggresive Make-up Sex is Awesome...

Smack My Bitch Up by The Prodigy YouTube Video

Couple: Emmett and Rosalie

Scenario: It’s Tuesday night and Rose is pissed. Things were said. Large items were thrown. Emmett knows she has every right to be angry with him. He should have called and let her know he was going to be late, AGAIN! But all he can think about is pulling her skirt up, bending her over the dinning room table and screwing the angry right out of her. Of course she'll let him.

Recommendation: Angry sex is some of the best sex there is. Pick a fight and get some.

Note: This video was banned on by Viacom for broadcasting on MTV and Vh1. Check it out. You'll see why.

TGIF!!!

Happy Friday! Here's last weeks song, for your screwing pleasure.

Arrive by Aloe Blacc YouTube Video

Couple: Jasper and Bella

Scenario: It's Thursday afternoon and Jasper comes home to find his roommate, Bella, has just gone through a horrible break up. He tries to comfort her, but hugging turns to kissing and kissing turns to something else entirely. Jasper’s not taking advantage, he just knows its time Bella knew what it feels like to be with a real man.

Recommendation: No matter the person’s true significance in your life, this song should be reserved for someone who you KNOW will give you that big O. Thanks to PippaPear for the song recommendation.

Can you say "DO ME"?

So in an effort to be as wonderfully awesome as my girl Bri/Anitaol, I've decided to create this little spot to archive our Perv Pack's Twilight inspired jams of the week. Here are the last few post, just to get you pervs caught up.

Time Flies by Lykke Li YouTube Video

Couple: Jake and Nessie

Scenario: It’s Saturday morning and it’s raining, like it had it been all night long. Boundaries have been crossed, limits tested. They’ve waited a long time. Finally Nessie decides to give herself to her boyfriend, her best friend. And just as she hoped, it was everything, better then she could have imagined. Slow and sensual and perfect.

Recommendation: However you make love, you should do it at least once to this song.

This song is a personal favorite of mine and I have been listening to it non-stop for the past couple week. Just thought I'd share.



Father Figure by George Michael YouTube Video

Couple: Edward and Bella

Scenario: It's Thursday Night and Bella's been bad, very, very bad. Edward thinks it's about time she was punished.

Recommendation:George Michael understands not to take the D/s relationship lightly and neither should you.


P.D.A (We Just Don't Care) by John Legend YouTube Video

Couple: Jasper and Alice

Scenario: It is most definitely Sunday afternoon. After a light picnic in the park and a couple hours of Jasper whispering sweet-nothings in his lady’s ear, Alice just can’t take it anymore. Screw waiting until they get home. Screw waiting until they get back to the car. Alice drags her man behind the boathouse for little Afternoon Delight, al fresco. She could give a crap if the guy manning the pontoon boats is staring or the two old ladies out for a scroll. She wants her man… NOW!

Recommendation: Avoided heavily wooded areas and gravel driveways. Other than that, GO FOR IT! Outdoor loving is so in this season.




Promise by Ciara YouTube Video

Couple: Emmett and Rosalie

Scenario: It’s Saturday night. The young twenty-something’s have just returned from a night out at the club. Having spent hours grinding up against each other, they ditched their friends to head back to Rose’s place to fuck each other's brains out. It’ll be hot, wet, hard and slow. Yeah Emmett’s a great lay, but it’s about something more. These two are really in love.

Recommendation: Reserve this for song for someone you are really into.